Into the Fire

Of the Cleansing of the Creative Soul, and How We are the Stakes of Beauty

Illustration of a phoenix, Germany circa 1790.

This is the third part of a foundational series of short essays here at The Rose Fire, beginning with “The Inconsolable Secret” and “The Hunger of the Dark.” The goal in this series is to outline a few of the concepts that shape how I view art, creativity, nature, and the soul—which are all, for me, deeply interdependent. I believe these ideas are deeply meaningful, and hope that you agree. If you are enjoying this series, please considering sharing it or discussing it with others who might appreciate it. - Paul

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The ocean in music rolls,
And gems are turning to eyes,
And the trees are gathering souls
For the day when the sleepers shall rise.
- George MacDonald, 1883

In the previous dispatches in this series, I have offered the idea that each of us, like all the parts of the great web of creation, have a unique natura—a way of being in the world that is specific to us, and good. This natura is the real and robust thing that contemporary language tries to describe with tepid phrases like “the real you” or “your authentic self,” but is infinitely more rooted and potent, because it has to do not with our feeling (though there is feeling), nor with our choice (though it calls to your deepest will), but with our participation and surrender to the vast and ordered goodness of the world, the great Way in which all things live and move and have their being. This natura is closely related to what we call “soul,” which I understand, with the agreement of many traditional cultures and the Jewish and Christian scriptures, to be the union of body and breath; form and life.

I have also offered the idea that Beauty in this world of natures is not really about appearances at all. In fact, like the old fairy tales, many things that look ugly on the surface contain Beauty inside them, and many things that are attractive are repulsive or treacherous within. In fact, we live in a world of considerable dangers, where it is possible that we, and the unique gift which is ours alone to give in all the world, may be devoured by those things “which eat attention”:

They lie, and seek to seed us with discontentment and distraction. They lie, and tempt us to constant participation in pointless games of competitive attention. They lie, and make us afraid. They lie, and entertain us with pretty garbage. They lie, and eat, eat, eat.

They eat minutes and hours and days and years. In aggregate, they are eating, at this moment, entire and literal centuries of human lives. Add the minutes up! Add the hours! Add, and be afraid! Add, and be angry!

My friend, you are a soul. You are a unique being composed of the union of the material and the immaterial, resulting in a person who has never before existed in history, and will never exist again. This includes both your body/mind and the spirit which animates it. It is what gives you your deepest you-ness.

This union that is you exists in relationship to the world. It is not static. But it also is not defined by the world. You are you, but that you is formed and finds its fit in the whole community of the created order. This belonging is interdependent. It gives and it recieves. It desires and it is desired. In this way, you learn to know what it is like to participate in the central engine and mystery of all things, which is Love.

Perhaps a good way of thinking about this uniqueness of soul is to consider your voice. You cannot change the length or resonance of your chest, nor any of the physical attributes that shape how you sound. Those things were given inside you, were measured and encoded into the holy writing, whose ink is DNA, that is rolled within the tabernacles of your cells.

But the language you speak, and the accent of that language are given to you from the people, time, and place into which you were born. Further, you may choose to speak deep and gruffly or in a high falsetto. You may sing. But you do so as a creature under the constraints of both natural reality and the setting in which you have found yourself, both of which shape your voice. I cannot wake up tomorrow and choose to perfectly nail the aria of The Queen of the Night from The Magic Flute. It is (very far) outside my nature. Nor can I wake up tomorrow and speak perfect Swahili. That is outside my nurture. I can choose many things, but I cannot choose anything, and in those limits, I know myself.

You see, I hope, the profound beauty of this. Should all go well, you fit into the world. No one else can speak or sing with the voice of your body. No one else can speak or sing with the voice of your life.

From that uniqueness comes a unique gift, a unique way of belonging in the world. This will be seen in who you are. In how you live. In what you make. In the unique shape, to paraphrase Jorge Luis Borges, that your life will make through time across the surface of the world. The presence of the oak tree in the forest is different than the presence of the maple. The environment gently changes around it. So it is with you, and with me. Like our voices are shaped in speech or song, our presence and action in the world is shaped by our nature. Of course, we take this all for granted. We take just about everything for granted.

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Grant for a moment that you are a soul, with a unique natura and gift. Grant also that you are living in conditions of considerable danger, assaulted on all sides by spiritual, social, and economic forces intent on using or “eating” you for their benefit. How are you to resist this, in order to know yourself and participate in the world as you have been made to do? The first step is usually an honest pain. I think it is best to speak of it using the terms of an old story.